It took ages to go to sleep last night... the record player must have got stuck on Cliffs "wired for sound" I lost count after 47 times, but Im glad Dan has found a friend in Mr Turkey.

Well, what a night, Renee is still snoozing, Dan is tucked up in his winnie-the-pooh sleeping bag, Mr Turkey was slumped on the floor with a bottle of QC clamped between his thighs..(Im glad, I was a bit worried about him) what with Renee and Mr Turkey in the same room, I wasnt sure what Id come down and find. Luckily it was just the smell of a farty room and the sounds of snoring.. a normal family...

Ill go into my kitchen and start breakfast, what a feast ill prepare.. fried bread in dripping, some of the left-over manx kippers I won at bingo, porridge. A real treat, Im feeding celebrities here, they have probably eaten at the Ritz, but they will never forget this!

The doorbell rang as I was cooking, it was 2 of their colleagues from the radio station, they had come to collect them for work.

The scream from Renee was unreal.... her QC drip had run dry and Im sure she knew there was 4 men in the same house, a quick flip on the back of the head with the kipper pan soon silenced her.

Dan and Mr Turkey woke up, (they had no choice, Renee fell on top of them. The 2 guys from Dans work helped me to pull her off them before they went completely blue. I put a pint of sherry into her drip bag to settle her and invited my new guests to stay for breakfast.

I covered Renees arse with paper table cloth from xmas , there was ample space for us all to eat.

It was all very civilised, we took turns to hold the "table" cloth down when the wind blew...

sadly Renee sustained a few minor burns off our tea, but she didnt notice, at least we didnt have a candle-lit meal... she would have been in hospital with 1st degree burns to her arse.

Im going to take a few pics of Dans new friends before they rush off... I think they do the breakfast show.. lovely lads both of them... but a bit odd compared to my lovely family...